3 Keys to Helping Someone with Depression

(The information and other content provided in this article, or in any linked materials, are not intended and should not be construed as medical advice, nor is the information a substitute for professional medical expertise or treatment. If you or a loved one has symptoms of depression, please see a doctor or counselor.)

Do you know someone who suffers from depression? Even if you can’t think of anyone, chances are they are there, suffering silently, afraid to speak up about their struggles. I know from experience how hard it is to admit that you need help out of the deep dark pit of depression.  I also know how crucial it is to take that first step toward healing, and how vital friends and family are in the process.

I want to help women out of the darkness and show others how to do the same. But I am not a doctor or a counselor, and depression is a complicated condition. Helping someone with depression isn’t easy, and there are no simple solutions.

There is no one-size-fits-all approach to healing because it affects every person differently.

Jesus shows us a good place to start when helping someone with depression.

3 Keys to Helping Someone with Depression

1. Compassion
2. Understanding
3. Encouragement

We take our cue from Jesus because He is our example to follow in all things. He is compassionate, understanding, and encouraging with those who are hurting.

Why? Because He loves them. When we are full of His word and tuned into His Spirit, we are equipped to minister to the troubled souls around us with grace, love, and truth.

Matthew 7:12 KJV ~ Therefore all things whatsovever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets.

Have Compassion When Helping Someone With Depression

Our friends with depression don’t want or need judgment or “tough love”. Telling them to “suck it up” or “snap out of it” is insensitive and can do serious damage to their mental wellbeing. 

Those who are defeated, discouraged, and despairing of life need gentleness, grace, and godly wisdom. They are fragile and require compassion.

It makes the hard and heartbreaking times easier to handle when someone lovingly listens and lends a hand out of the pit. Click To Tweet

It is often difficult for people battling depression or other mental illnesses to reveal that to others.  For fear of judgment, we plaster on a smile and hide our struggles.

As a pastor’s wife and ministry leader, it was tough for me to admit that I needed help because I thought I should have it all together. I placed unrealistic expectations and high standards on myself. It was humbling to confess to my husband that I was depressed.

I felt like a failure. Vulnerable, weak, and exposed. But that was my first step toward the light, and I am so glad God gave me the courage to take it. My husband was so compassionate and caring. His prayers and support helped me tremendously. He showed me by example how to help others with depression.

James 5:16 KJV ~ Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.

Compassion opens the door for honest communication which is a vital component of the healing process. People who are suffering need empathy and kindness, so they can feel safe to share their struggles.

Helping Someone With Depression Requires Understanding

If you have never experienced depression it may be difficult to understand what it feels like, so it’s important to study the triggers, traits, and treatments. Researching how it affects the brain, and hearing testimonies of those who have depression helps to build our understanding of it.

There are also several biblical accounts of men and women who were depressed, including David (Psalms), Jeremiah (Lamentations), Job (the book of Job), Naomi (Ruth), and Hannah (1 Samuel 1).

Pray for wisdom from the Lord when supporting someone who suffers from depression or other mental illness. (James 1:5) God knows exactly what they are going through, what they need to hear, and what is going to help them the most.

Here are some links to helpful articles on depression:

• https://www.webmd.com/depression/guide/what-is-depression
• https://www.healthline.com/health/depression
• https://www.relevantmagazine.com/life5/5-things-christians-should-know-about-depression-and-anxiety/
• https://www.cru.org/us/en/blog/life-and-relationships/emotions/to-the-depressed-christian.html

I love this quote by Brandon W. Peach from the Relevant Magazine article linked above:

“It’s not a character defect, a spiritual disorder or an emotional dysfunction. And chief of all, it’s not a choice. Asking someone to “try” not being depressed is tantamount to asking someone who’s been shot to try and stop bleeding. Such an attitude can dangerously appear in the Church as, “if only you had enough faith.””

Be Encouraging To Those Who Are Depressed

We can help lift spirits and refresh souls with compassion and understanding by:

• Being present
• Praying for them
• Being patient with them
• Paying attention to them

And of course, we are not really helping someone with depression if we neglect to tell them of the mighty power of God and the ability He holds to transform their lives. Our friends who are depressed need encouragement to look to Jesus for help during their difficulties.

Even believers need reminding of the truth of the gospel. We can urge them to recall who they are in Christ, who God is, and what He has done before, to strengthen their hope and resolve to fight against the devices of the devil who seeks to destroy them.

Lamentations 3:21-23 KJV ~ This I recall to my mind, therefore have I hope. It is of the LORD’S mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness.

Bear The Burdens of Those Who Are Depressed

Galatians 6:2 KJV – Bear ye one another’s burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ.

To love our neighbors as ourselves we have to bear their burdens. That means we must step down into the trenches with them and support them in their struggles. Jesus explains what bearing the burdens of others looks like with the parable of the good Samaritan in Luke 10:25-37. This man pitied someone in need and went above and beyond to meet those needs.

As ambassadors for Christ and ministers of reconciliation, we represent Him and are His hands and feet in the world today. Now more than ever, people need the love, hope, and peace that comes from Jesus Christ. When we are yielded to the Holy Spirit and allow the Comforter to work through us we can edify and encourage those who suffer from depression and help bring light into their darkness.

Who can you extend compassion, understanding, and encouragement to today?

Galatians 5:14 KJV ~ For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this; Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.

(If you have a friend who suffers from depression, let them know that they are seen, heard, understood, and loved. Along with spiritual support, offer to help them get counseling and other medical help. I also recommend the book Refresh by Shona and David Murray. It helped me understand depression from a medical standpoint and gave me practical ways to fight against it.)   

Free Devotional in my Resource Library

On my “Resources” page I added several new tools for spiritual growth. The most recent being the “7 Days to More Peace of Mind” devotional bundle! It includes 7 devotions, scripture lists, quotes, and poems, all on the topic of worry. I’m selling 7 Days to More Peace of Mind as an eBook on Amazon, but I’m offering it to my email subscribers for FREE! 

There is also a “How to Study the Bible” handbook in that resource library. It is a 17-page guide with step-by-step instructions, study sheets, study guidelines, and more! If you would like to dig deeper into the Bible for yourself, then this free resource is for you!

I have also included other bible study worksheets, beautiful graphics, printables (like scriptures for a sober mind), bookmarks, and more. To tap into all the goodies, just enter your email address in the “subscribe” section of this page. When you do that, you will get a confirmation email with the password to my Resource Library. Then you will also receive my blog posts in your email inbox as well.

(If you are already subscribed to Daily His Disciple, email me and I will send you the link and password!)

Pray With Confidence

Prayer is vital for someone with depression. If you would like to grow in your prayer life, then check out Pray with Confidence.  It’s a website for helping women overcome prayer obstacles, and I am one of the monthly contributors. Here are a few links I think will be a blessing to you:

Why Does God Allow Suffering?

3 Short Prayers for Spiritual Stability

19 Bible Verses that Reveal the Will of God

Check out the prayer resources, Bible verses, and tough questions tabs as well.  There are many great options to boost your spiritual growth!